19June12
Of course I post last night that I won’t be blogging much, and yet, tonight, God provides me with time. And honestly, some things that I need to say just to remind myself. Much of this is lessons I am learning, and that I need to continuously remind myself.
Here I sit, in La Croix, Haiti, up near Gonaives. I mistakenly called this trip to near Cap Haitien, mostly because I had no idea where I was going, or what I was doing, except that I knew God brought me here, through Cherith.
And now, I’m sitting on a roof, overlooking a 7000 Watt solar panel array as the sun goes down. God has indeed brought me here.
The work has been great. I am helping a contractor and, well, to be honest, Dave, with this work. I just put Dave in his own class, cause he was a teacher, and yet he’s done solar work in the states (3 installations), and he’s done a little of everything coming down to Haiti about 4 times a year for about 10 years. Kinda ridiculous actually.
I’ve learned quite a bit from him, and been able to help and teach them while we’re at it.
Tomorrow, we should finish installing this system, then it will just be a lot of testing to make sure it switches right, since we want it to automatically cycle from inverter to grid power, to starting the generator automatically, and go back and forth as needed.
It’s ambitious, but should be a great experience to see if we can get it to work here.
Additionally, I’ve gotten to share a bit with the group that is here.
But now, I just had to process a bit of what God has been doing in my life outside of the work.
I’m here, with Cherith, once again. She is most definitely my sister. I wish her husband, Dan, was here too, but he’s in Austrailia for work. Either way, it’s great to work with Cherith, and share this time with her. It reminds me how much God has provided for me.
He gave me a great family from birth. I am truly blessed to have my parents, and my brother, and my extended family, all of them. I have learned many lessons, and God has developed me through each of them in many different ways.
But, He has given me even more than that. He has always known that I needed more than just my family, and that I need family wherever I am. I never realized how far “where I am” would take me. I was content to stay in Johnstown, but He had other plans.
And when He lead me to Cedarville, He provided family there too. Cherith, Dan, Megan, Palmer, et al…
Truly, I never realized how much the Kennedy’s (Cherith and Dan) would become my family. I have been in both their families houses, worked with them in disaster relief, at the NICU waiting room, and the craziest wedding I have ever seen. We are family, and that got me through many things during college, and even now as I’m a vagabond.
I always talk about Cherith, but Dan is truly amazing as well. There are few people I will seek for advice on topics very close to my heart, and he is one of them. He was the one I called several months ago, as God was breaking me, and as I was hitting a deep point of depression. He provided some guidance, but helped me the most in seeking what God had for me, and just encouraging me through my struggles. So, I must thank him for that.
When I moved to North Carolina, God provided again, with the Corbins, and Joe, who became my family again. The Corbins showed me love and hospitality even when I didn’t really fit into the typical culture in Franklin, and God knew I needed it at that point.
And now, I am in Haiti. And God continues to provide. He has given me many people to work with, and to establish great friendships. I now have friends throughout the country, even ones I can call on when I have nothing to offer and only needs. God has truly provided.
I value each of these friendships deeply, but now God has provided my family in Haiti too. I realized that one of my definitions of family is the people who I can go to, no matter the condition. To that end, I know the Mangine’s are now my family, after the time last week when I showed up at their house, smelling terrible after a day’s work, and just walked in, with my clean clothes and a towel in hand, and stopped just long enough to “ask” if I could take a shower, knowing that I was already welcome.
God has blessed me with a great family here in Haiti, and I love them, even Piman (their dog) with all her slobber and ridiculous underbite.
I knew I made it into the family when Schneider (the baby) even started waving at me, and Nia (their daughter) invited me to stay anytime, knowing that I steal her room when I stay there.
So, I thank God for all He has provided for me.
**Aside: Thanks to Nick Mangine, who purchased a moto for me since I can’t own it myself. Yep, I have a Jailing 125cc, dirt bike style now…woot!**
And I am reminded of the song “Tis So Sweet” again.
“Jesus, Jesus, How I trust Him, How I’ve proved him O’er and O’er”
“Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus, O for faith to trust Him more”
This song certainly rings through even more now, as God is providing my family down here, I would be lying if I didn’t add in that I would love to have the family for someone else to be a part of too. It’s great to keep adding brothers and sisters, but eventually a wife would be nice.
And God has shown glimpses of what could be.
He has revealed to me a model of what a godly woman looks like, someone who is actively seeking after Him and trying to grow deeper in her own faith, and trusting that God will provide. And I dare to say that sometimes it feels like a tease, when God shows what could be, only to say, “not now”, which is where I find myself.
My realization is that the only way I can find who God wants me to be with is to continue to follow Him wholeheartedly, and trust that He will provide.
So, it’s where I find myself.
I am sure glad that He has proved himself O’er and O’er.
He has provided for all my other needs in life, including when I needed families to “adopt” me, so now I have to look to Him again, and let Him lead and wait for Him to reveal his plans for my future. Knowing that He has proved all the while that He will show me just enough for today, because I can’t handle plans for further ahead than that.
It ain’t easy, but God is faithful. I have no idea how this will turn out.
I may end up single, as He is teaching me to be content again with that outcome, as hard as it is.
I may end up married, but only if He leads me there.
but, I may end up dead.
Either way, I’m with Him, and that is enough to keep me going strong.